Does avoiding food help overeating?

Seeing the world through the eyes of my toddler is nothing if not joyful.

“Do you want to go in the trolley?”

Her face lighting up like a Christmas tree, knowing she can be pushed around Asda and tell me about the “yaya” (banana) and apppple she would like me to buy.

The small things..

This particular day, the 6th January to be exact, bought me a real feeling of appreciation, gratitude, pride, I was grounded, on the first aisle of Asda, you know the one that confirms how much capitalism is in our day to day life’s, the “offer aisle”. It stopped me. Halted me.

One of the reasons I used to believe I was broken.

One of the biggest players in my belief around food addiction.

One of the most challenging foods I ever had, that came with a bank of evidence of overeating, binge eating.

Mini eggs.

In January, Easter chocolate is back out.

The moment I had, a gentle reflection, I smiled at the mini eggs, now being one of my most loved foods, and one I never binge on.

I didn’t buy any, I didn’t have any food noise, nor any desire to eat them… just yet.

I felt calm, peaceful, content, knowing I still had a bucket load of chocolate in the house from Christmas (& actually last Easter)

I didn’t feel like they were controlling me like they used to, I felt in control.

A polar opposite feeling to that of a decade ago.

I genuinely believed I couldn’t be around food.

That I was broken, having blood tests, intolerance tests, IBS checks, dieticians reports..

WHAT WAS WRONG WITH ME!!

I’d tried it all, been around the block so to speak,

Avoid, remove, restrict, somewhat gaslight.

Convincing myself this time will be “different”

Buckling up with some ludicrous nonsense about motivation.

Buying some new diet plan, new diet shakes, new detox supplements that promised me the world.

But I was still binge eating

I still hated my body

The food still felt like it controlled me

Like it was the one thing I did for me

Food was both safety and feared.

All these years later I’m still so grateful to younger me, who led with courage, bravery, vulnerability.

Who challenged herself to become healthy, to break down beliefs, rules, biases.

To end the constant struggle with food, her body.

Because of her I can stand in Asda and feel content with food.

Because of her I know I’m not addicted.

Because of her I know I was never broken.

And nor are you.

January is like a revolving month of Mondays,

Everyone everywhere is telling you to “be healthy, get back on it, get in shape”

A subliminal message that you aren’t enough as you are, weight bias, reductive.

In that message is those same behaviours I followed…

Avoid food

Ban food

Remove food

You probably have the evidence of how you have overeaten that food.

Like I did with mini eggs.

So to you, it seems right to follow the above.

You’re doing the best you can with what you know

Truth is, that exact behaviour is the behaviour that triggers MORE overeating

That sends you into a spiral of guilt, shame and weight gain (the one thing you try to control)

Avoidance triggers the abstinence violation effect.

A minor violation, you eat one mini egg, triggers the brain to go “SCREW THIS I’VE FAILED MIGHT AS WELL EAT MORE”

Not because you’re broken, but because;

• You believe food is bad

• You avoid the food

• You have a bank of rules and beliefs with food

• You lack permission to eat

• Food has served a purpose, emotionally

• You lead with restriction in more ways than just calories

• You haven’t an inclusive diet

• Self compassion feels inaccessible and wrong

• You dismiss mindfulness

I know, what a blow to the face. Like a brick wall thrown at you.

I didn’t mean to be so harsh, but I am fed up of seeing such nonsense online about “food freedom”

Coaches pushing freedom disguised as health wrapped up in tracking calories and fat loss

That is not freedom, that is control.

That is feeding your food noise, overeating and keeping you stuck in this same cycle.

The cycle you want to get off.

It is possible, but its not possible with the same behaviours, because as our trip to Asda confirmed, food is everywhere, we live in a world of food abundance, we have more availability than ever before, and trying to avoid it is now impossible.

Supermarkets, staff rooms, offices, gatherings, parties, petrol stations.

Food is everywhere

You don’t overeat the food because of the food.

Overeating is multifactorial, overcoming it is not about stopping eating.

It’s about building trust, confidence and inclusion with your diet.

Understanding your needs, meeting them outside of food.

Breaking down the fear around food, trigger foods, and bringing a sense of freedom.

To all food.

So you haven’t the novelty, the noise, the constant feeling of out of control.

It’s exactly what we do at Thrive, end the war, the fight, and bring you the peace, calm, and sense of pride to your food relationship.

Reclaiming your autonomy, your health, a feeling of being in control. It's all here for you....

Thrive with Life Coaching